Cocktail #3

Well I did it. I wore the hat with the hair hanging down to my last cocktail and got a good laugh from the staff. Unfortunately, all the people who were at the last treatments weren't there so the new ones looked at me a little askance. I haven't taken a picture of me in the hat, yet, but will, and will post it next time. This techy stuff is a grinder. The treatment went well and, as in the prior treatments, the 7 days following are an interesting ride. Have a taste in my mouth like I swallowed some rabbit droppings (a memory of my brother Ralph convincing me as a youngster that they were raisins).

I had an opportunity to visit with our niece who just had a beautiful boy a couple of days ago, and her mother was there. She's married to my brother Merrill, who's coming up from California this week, and what a delightful family. We, the Brintons, are having a get-together this Thursday and I'm so looking forward to it. There is not a time we get-together that we don't laugh and love a lot. We've all been blessed with our parents sense of humor and the ability to see humor in just about everything. As an example, Babs asked me the other morning as we were reading the paper, "Will you help me write your obituary?" I told her that was another seven word sentence that one doesn't want to hear, like the doctor saying some months ago, "You better get your affairs in order." We had a good laugh about that. However...I am insisting that she take the first bite out of all the food we eat!

I also went to a dermatologist to look at some skin blemishes on the back of my hand and some sun spots on my face (from sun worshiping in my earlier days around pools, and on the slopes of Utah). After telling me a good joke, he then said to his nurse, "Get me the frozen gun." For those of you who don't know, they zap any superficial skin cancer before they become serious. Well I felt he went a little crazy with the gun. When he was finished, the back of my hands looked like a leper's (I'll not include photos) and my nose was as red as a clown's at Ringling Bros. Upon looking at myself in the mirror on the way home, I had a big grin what with my white bolder dome and red nose. Fortunately these blemishes are short lived.

I'm meeting Bruce and Tomazina Mulhearn in Park City along with Bruce's brother Tim, who's a delightful fellow, tomorrow evening for dinner. So looking forward to it. Family gathering Thursday, and leaving for Orlando this Saturday for RE/MAX Convention, and then I'm golfing in a tournament on Sunday. It's the first time I'll be on golf course in over 7 months. I feel for the partners they've assigned me to, however I'll be grinning the total round. Looking forward to seeing many friends.

Love to ALL,

Howard

A full weekend

What a weekend! Friday began with the early arrival of my daughter Darcie and our three beautiful granddaughters (from California). Adele, the middle one, had called earlier in the week to ask if she could work while here to earn some money to buy a bunny (rabbit, for those who think of bunnies in a different light). It was one of the most delightful conversations I'd had with her. After agreeing to grant her request by hiring her, I asked her how much she could lift. She said, "I don't know." I asked, "Can you lift 10-15 pounds because your work may require some lifting." She said, "Just a minute." I could hear her in the background asking her mom and she came back with,

"I can lift as much as you need with my Mom and Dad's help."

"Who's going to pay them, you? Or will I have to?"

"Just a minute,” (whispers) “I will."

"Good I respect that, now, how much are you worth?"

"I don't know."

"Are you worth a dollar?"

"Yes."

"Are you worth $10,000 dollars?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Well all we need to do is find out where you fit in between a dollar and ten thousand dollars and we'll know how to set up a pay scale, so where do you think you'll fit within there?"

"Just a minute,” (whispers) “I'm worth a million dollars, but I don't charge that per hour."

And the conversation went on and on like that until we agreed to agree on a rate before they began work on Friday. Darcie came on the phone and commented about Adele’s perseverance once she sets her mind to doing something. It was a joy to participate in. So when they showed up for breakfast Friday morning (by their admission, Grandpa's breakfasts are one of their favorite things when they visit) we sat down and looked over a job description I had typed up for her and her sisters (Tennie, who's also saving for a bunny, and Ceci, who's saving for an unidentified “furry and cuddly” animal). We went over the jobs and requirements and they all signed it before we began. 

Setting the table was the first task before they could eat. Part of the job description began with having a "can do" attitude in all things listed, operating with an "attitude of curiosity" so that if they didn't know how to complete a task they would ask, and operating in a "spirit of teamwork". A bonus was offered if they accomplished all of those three elements plus all the tasks listed. After that, the day was a whirlwind of work and enjoyable moments. After cleaning up the breakfast plates, we went outside to pick up the dog poop. That stretched their "can do" attitude and I shared a wisdom learned from someone, "Do the most difficult thing first in the day and all else is easy and flows after that."

I joined them in emptying the "Poop bucket". Tennie and I wished we had a mask, however the task ended successfully and they were obviously glad to move onto the next job.

Walking the dogs was a task that they loved. Kipper, their little champion, joined our Charlie and Ella and each of the kids took responsibility for a long walk around the beautiful Draper Park. We stopped to pet 5 horses that were drawn to the love these kids have for animals. They have an instinctive connection. Adele loves horses (even taking lessons in her home state). I see a barrel racer in the making.

Preparing a potato salad was another task that they jumped into with relish, slicing and dicing until it was complete. Six quiches (for Adele's baptism on Saturday) was another task that they tackled, with Ceci and Babs preparing the crust prior to the oven doing its part.

Vacuuming was one of the areas they tackled, working as a team.

The highlight however on the job description was a foot massage for Grandpa and Babs, and Tennie and Adele showed great talent. In fact, for an old physical therapist (me) they showed exceptional talent. I could have stayed in that chair for hours.

Babs made a homemade carrot cake, and we had our own belated birthday party for Adele.

When they visited me last summer, I was determined to introduce them to golf, and my lesson held their attention for about 97 seconds. Realizing I had little knowledge of how to engage them in the game, I included it in their job description: a golf lesson at Junior Golf Academy. They took to it with relish, and even asked to take home the clubs I'd purchased for them to learn on. This pleased me to no end. I look forward to the day when I can take them on a regular course.

Adele showed me pictures, and shared all sorts of personal details, of their year in France. Overall, the day with them was one of my best ever. I can easily see how many of you who've raved about your grandkids over the years came by it so honestly.

Friday was also a banner day for Star Power, the business Babs and I ran for so many years. We received many e-mails from "Stars" (top agents who share their success practices with others...and each other) who were thrilled with the direction Alex Charfen and his team are taking Star Power. We couldn't be more thrilled with Alex and the leadership and talent he brings to so many. We were so fortunate to have him and his wife Cadey come into our lives.

Friday was also a big day for our son Mitch and his wife Joann and their son Tag. Mitch and Joann were sealed in the Mormon Temple in Provo, Utah. This is a HUGE thing for any Mormon couple, and there were smiles from ear to ear for so many family members at dinner afterwards. Joann has a great family, and of course I think Mitch's is pretty good, so the combination and blending make for a great family gathering, which was the first of two this past weekend. We slept well Friday.

Saturday was Adele's baptism into the Mormon faith. We were so proud of her for her choices (baptism is done at age 8) as she takes on the responsibility of her choices in life. What a wonderful experience. Darcie gave a talk, as did Joann. In talking to youngsters, they had props, engaged them with questions and I was so proud of Darcie's kids, as they had every answer on their tongue before the question was asked. I know they must get their brilliance from their mom and dad! Geoff's side of the family was there in abundance (at least 5 of his 8 siblings) and their kids, so cousins were everywhere, as were Grandparents and loved ones. Babs and I enjoyed it so. They even asked me to say a few words, which is somewhat of an oxymoron as they said about a minute or so. I don't even work up a sweat in a minute, but I relied on love and the spirit of the event to let Adele know how proud we were of her and that she has so many loved ones who are there to support and love her throughout her life. The six quiches were part of a brunch afterwards that everyone contributed to. Food and company were great!

Sunday was another family gathering at my brother Ralph and his lovely wife Bonnie's beautiful home. The occasion was the blessing (or christening) of Tag. He was in his element. For a two-month old child, he has personality to burn. There must have been 70 family and friends there to enjoy the experience plus another family pot luck dinner. With this much food, I can hardly wait for my weigh-in this Thursday when I go for my third Chemo cocktail. For the food, Joann's parents made a Texas brisket that still makes my mouth water. There is nothing better than being around family when the atmosphere is filled with love. We have that a lot of that at the Brintons!

Today, Monday, saw Darcie, Geoff and the girls depart for California. I'll miss them and the energy they bring, but know I had the opportunity to engage with my grandchildren like I'd never done before. It was a special time.

Today also brought me great pleasure when RE/MAX International called and they are flying me down to their Annual Convention in Orlando to be in the opening session (7-10,000 people) with their founder and Chairman of the Board, Dave Liniger. It will give me an opportunity to talk about the "Attitude of Gratitude" which I've really taken to heart. What it means in essence is that no matter how difficult things are, or how bad the experience or situation, there is always something to be grateful for. This will give me the opportunity to thank Dave and the whole RE/MAX network for all they've given to Babs and me over the years. They have been so supportive of our efforts to educate agents and I've known Dave since he started this great franchise. They're also letting me golf in the tournament which will be my first outing for longer than I can remember and I'm so jazzed.

Well, that's all for now. I’ll be back after Thursday's chemo round. I'm planning on wearing a hat that has long hair hanging out from the side (a gift from Star Chip Neumann years ago) and asking fellow Chemo-ites what their problem is with losing their hair......I've had the opposite reaction!

Love you all......

Chemo treatment #2

My dad had his second chemo treatment yesterday and will have his third in three weeks. Here’s an update, in his own words:

Thanks so much for your wonderful responses to the Blog, and yes, I'm very fortunate to have a loving daughter that's talented in ways that continue to fill me with pride and happiness. I finished my second Chemo yesterday along with one of my Zometa treatments. The Zometa is for strengthening the bones which are weakened by taking Lupron, the anti-testerone stuff that's got me looking forward to the AARP Magazine more than the Sports Illustrated Swim Suit issue. I’m every three months on that stuff, and it keeps me VERY save in all female circles. The Chemo went well. I had three people that were there at the last treatment and it was like old home week. We laughed a lot, and they commented about the amount of hair I had on the first treatment. I wore my French beret, and they welcomed me to the "Hat Club". Good people. I am encouraged by the strength I've been feeling. No pain at all which was quite intrusive prior to the radiation last fall. So far, it's been absent and I've had a great appetite, even gaining weight. I’m walking the dogs and extending the length of time, and even breaking out a sweat. Hot flashes have subsided since taking some type of medicine for that. I have the same empathy for women that I discovered when I forgot to put the toilet seat down one evening years ago. At a 3:00 AM urge, I damn near settled in the water as I sat on the porcelain. I have dutifully replaced the toilet seat since. Didn't realize what hot flashes were like but do now, and have a new found respect for what women go through.

A high School buddy called me the other day and suggested we go to a place to hit golf balls. I love golf, as you know, and hadn't had a club in my hands for 5 months, so I agreed immediately. It was at an indoor Junior Golf School where you hit into a net some 15-20 yards away. Half hour for $5.00, unbelievable price. We shared the range with two 5-year-olds, and two 8-year-olds. I am going to take my grand-daughters there for a lesson. I tried to give them a lesson last summer in Colorado, by myself, and it lasted around 4 minutes before they lost interest in the sage wisdom I was attempting to pass on. Back to my visit, I was golfed-out after 25 minutes, but shots were pretty impressive. Ball didn't have much time to hook or slice, so I felt every shot was straight, far, and accurate. Love that place. Am looking forward to next visit and to spring season.

Some things have changed, some remain the same. When I was at it full time, and had a project, presentation, task, negotiation, etc. the next day, my mind was always active in my dreams. I'd go over the presentation, often getting up early and making last minute tweaks. I'd play 18 holes in my mind on the course, and often had many pars and birdies (this didn't really transfer to my game unfortunately, but my mind was always active). The change now is I think of what I'm going to fix Babs and me for food the next day - planning out breakfast, lunch and dinner. The same is that the mind is such a wonderful thing. Had an old college buddy send me an email calling me Jubilation T. Fleabone. That struck a memory of my first year in college where I played a flea in a play and sang a song, "Just blew in from the windy city, the windy city is mighty pretty but they ain't got what we got, no siree. They got stacks up to seven stories but they don't have any morning glories, no they ain't got what we got, no siree." Ah yes the mind is a wonderful thing. I'm blessed to have mine flash back on many pleasant memories of all of you which give me great pleasure and joy. Thanks for them all.

With Love,
Howard

The new look!

About a week ago my dad told me his hair was falling out. It was all over the inside of his hat, it was coming out in large quantities in his brush, and occasionally it would fall out and tickle his nose. I encouraged him to take a picture of his long, curly locks (he was hoping for a pony tail but didn't quite make it) before he shaved it off. He sequenced the progression of his new look for all of our pleasure!

A First

Hey all who want to spend a few minutes following my joyous journey to well-being. I thought it would be appropriate that I write one of the first posts. So here goes.....

I love Firsts, always have and suppose I always will. From my first solo singing experience in Mrs. Jones 2nd grade class with a fine rendition of "I am a Utah Cowboy"; to my first base hit; my first home run; my first touchdown; my first date; my first sale; my first love; my first college day; my first son; my first speaking event where I was paid; my first grandson; my first granddaughter; and yesterday I had another first: my first Chemo treatment. I think Babs was preparing for the worst and hoping for the best which is the way we've planned to approach our future. We journeyed to the Huntsman Center where a staff of fine doctors and support people, whom we'd met on prior visits, prepared us for out first injection of Chemo (Docetaxel for those of you who might be hearing it for the first time...so I could give you a First).

As you arrive for these visits, you first have blood drawn (a First from a new attendant) for a number of things; you then get a visit by an attending doctor or your main doctor, plus four nurses who seem dedicated to serving that primary doctor. I'm engaged in a base-line Chemo that will run for 12 visits occurring every three weeks. In addition, I'm engaged in two studies: 1) a new wonder drug for the treatment of bone cancer that has metastasized from the prostrate I'll either get the drug or a placebo (sugar pill). I expect to be one of the miracle people in the study who improve with either! 2) A study for the future cure for those with Prostrate cancer. It won't help me but allows me to help others, so a no brainer.

Babs accompanied me. I had gum to chew and had taken pills during prior 12 hours to prepare for Chemo infusion (in my arm by an IV). Room was lined with recliners, and filled to capacity with other Chemo recipients and their spouses, children, and grandchildren (one per patient). As soon as one's treatment finishes, another is there to fill the chair, and each is at a different stage of illness. Reminded me of the adage of my loving mother who said, no matter how bad you think your situation is there is always someone who's going through a tougher time. An example was a young fellow (30's) who has to have treatment seven days a week for five weeks.....and he's on his second round of treatments. I immediately thought of the book "Gratitude" given me by Orly Steinberg with the bottom-line message being, no matter what happens to you, you can find multiple reasons to be grateful for everything around you. Seeing the many patients at different stages of severity caused me to be so grateful for the two quiches and chicken noodle soup I made prior to going in, my lovely Babs at my side, the grandson whose innocence is so pure and beautiful, and this list could go on and on. I was grateful for the continued offering of juices and snacks, the warm blanket laid over me, the pillow, and the wit of those going through the same process. One lady departing said, "Enjoy your cocktail" and I looked up and it did look like a nice brand of Vodka, so I ordered a couple of V-8 juices and envisioned a Bloody Mary. There was a woman and her son from Wyoming who'd just buried their husband/father, sold their 2,800 Cattle Ranch, and were now facing new challenges. Another thing I'm grateful for is the learning of the salutation, "Super fantastic" when someone asks me how I’m doing? It does put those around me into a fresh frame of mind, and uplifts their spirits.

The nurse covered all the repercussions and side affects of the Chemo. She spoke of hair loss (giving me two weeks) which will be another First to look forward to. (Geoff Davis, my wonderful son in law, asked me if I wanted him to shave off his head when I do mine. While touched by the support, I declined as I think his scalp is much more attractive than mine). Then there's all the normal list of diarrhea and constipation (hopefully not at the same time), nail deterioration (so I'm getting a pedicure from Babs), nausea, fatigue, mouth stuff....and when she was finished I said, "The only thing I didn't see on here was what to do if I get a four hour erection." That got a good laugh.

So this is my First blog post, hope you enjoyed. Feeling strong. Know I'll have some adjustments. Will tackle them with a Super Fantastic attitude and spirit.

Thanks for all your love and support.....we feel it and it's working.

Best always,
Howard J. Brinton

Hello and welcome!

My dad asked me to maintain a blog in an attempt to keep friends and family updated on his health and treatment. This blog will be by invitation only, and we would appreciate if you would not forward or share access.

My dad and Babs are overwhelmed with your kindness. They acknowledge and are grateful for all of your calls of encouragement and support; they feel your love and concern. My dad is pretty lousy at being sick, and most of Babs’ time and limited energy is wrapped up in the care of him. With that in mind, they have asked for the next six months or so, that all communication be written –either by leaving a comment on this blog (they’ll get a copy of it), or by email or a card. Please understand if neither he nor Babs respond.

I know that many of you want to DO something to show your love. When I asked my dad what people could do, he asked simply for your prayers.

If you have any questions please email me directly at darciedavis@yahoo.com and I will do my best to answer them in a timely manner.

Long live Howard!

Darcie Brinton Davis
President, Howard Brinton Fan Club